You know when your watching a Slasher flick, and the main protagonist is so dumb and annoying, you actually want them to die. Well this boils and ghouls, is the absolute worst of the worst. A little while back, I wrote a segment on the Final Girls who are so kick ass, they have earned title of a Scream Queen. To give these ladies that title would give the viewer a false representation of what a true Scream Queen is. Without further ado, I present the 13 worst Final Girls in Horror cinema.
13. Rooney Mara (Nancy Holbrook) - A Nightmare on Elm Street (Remake)
Believe it or not, this is the same chick from The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo. Obviously she has talent, but not in this movie. She's bland and boring. She doesn't display much emotion and I think I saw her fight back maybe once. It's a real shame that they didn't use Rooney's co-star, Katie Cassidy to play Nancy. She was the real talent in this movie.
12. Amanda Righetti (Whitney Miller) - Friday the 13th (Remake)
First off, I absolutely love this movie. It's graphic and violent and doesn't stray from the source material from the original movies. None the less, the leading lady sucked. She gets captured at the beginning of the movie, and doesn't get rescued by her brother until the last 20 minutes. Yeah she defeats Jason, kind of, but only to ruin the moment by saying one of the most over the top lines I have ever heard in this franchise, "Say hello to mommy, in hell!" Again, just like in A Nightmare on Elm Street, Amanda's co-star played by Danielle Panabaker (See Top 13 Scream Queens) should have easily been The Final Girl in this movie.
11. Jennifer Carpenter (Angela Vidal) - Quarantine
This movie is scary as hell. Absolutely frighting images of zombies and great camera work. But Jennifer was more like a damsel in distress character, than a Final Girl. Annoying breathing and crying....that was her performance...
10. Alexandra Daddario ( Heather Miller) - Texas Chainsaw 3D
Alexandra was a big miscast. She should have been playing the slutty friend instead of the lead. Looking like she just got off the set of an adult film, and her acting to prove it, Alexandra's character made some of the dumbest and I mean DUMBEST decisions. I feel like I can't give away the ending, but she delivers the absolute worst line in Horror cinema: "Do your thing cuz!"
9. Bianca Kajlich (Sara Moyer) - Halloween: Resurrection
Yes, Halloween: Resurrection had plenty of flaws, but Bianca is without a doubt, the wort actress the Halloween franchise has ever had. Her screaming is comical, her acting horrid, and she gets rescued by Busta Rhymes. Yes, Busta Rhymes. At least we were able to see Jamie Lee Curtis one last time...That kind of made up for this....didn't it....
8. Alicia Witt (Natalie Simon) - Urban Legend
Wait, there was a Final Girl in this movie? Yes, Alicia Witt is plain, boring, and non-memorable. She would have been just fine if she was the friend of the Final Girl....who would have gotten killed in the second act.
7. Marilyn Burns (Sally Hardesty) - The Texas Chainsaw Massacre
People might say how absolutely terrifying this movie is, and the're right. This movie gave birth to one of the most sadistic Slashers of all time, Leatherface. But the problem with this movie is our "heroine". She can run, i'll give her that much, but she screams, she screams, and then she screams some more. That's all she freaking does in this movie is scream. Her screaming is so annoying, you just want her to be killed off so you don't have to hear it anymore.
6. Brittany Snow (Donna Keppel) - Prom Night
Prom Night is a prime example of why Slasher movies should never be PG-13. Bloodless, not scary, and whiny crying teens. Brittany's performance is so forgettable. I think I remember her crying...Oh wait, I remember, she cried, and then she cried some more, and then it ended. Piece of rubbish film.
5. Bobbi Sue Luther (The Girl) - Laid to Rest
This is what happens when a director puts his talent less wife in a movie... You get Laid to Rest. Yeah, the gore and special effects are quite good in this Slasher, but it can't save it from the god awful acting of Bobbi Sue Luther. There is really nothing more to say here other than the fact that it was a complete waste of the special effects guys time.
4. Elizabeth Berridge (Amy Harper) - The Funhouse
I have a special place in my heart for this movie, because it was the first Slasher flick I had ever seen as a little kid. After re-watching it recently, I had never seen someone so undeserving of The Final Girl role of 80's Slashers. She literally does noting to defeat the killer; just cries and screams in the corner. The killer basically kills himself accidentally. Lame. Good scares, horrible lead.
3. Shelly Duval (Wendy Torrance) - The Shining
A whiny and completely worthless character. It's to bad that The Shining is the most mainstream Horror movie on this list. Completely portrays a Horror heroine falsely to the mainstream public. Sad face.
2. Monica Keena (Lori Campbell) - Freddy vs Jason
This is a movie where you are saying "Can everyone please just die." Absolutely terrible stereotypical high school characters. But Monica Keena's the worst. Her whininess, overacting, and when she screams "Welcome to my world bitch!" you literally bust out laughing. This is a movie where you could't give a crap about any of the characters, cause let's face it, you're here to watch Freddy and Jason pit it out.
1. Jennifer Love Hewitt (Julie James) - I Know What You Did Last Summer
The whinest and worst of them all, Jennifer Love Hewitt is the WORST Final Girl in movie history. A completely weak and uninteresting character, it has you scratching your head why? There is absolutely nothing going on with her. Completely useless, you start questioning why you started watching Horror movies in the first place. Don't worry though, if you want to laugh, just wait until she screams "What are you waiting for huh!?" She will have you rolling on the floor with laughter in no time.
-Johnny Fright
